Continuum

Some people are lucky enouh to found and managed to settle as loyal spouse to their so called soul - mate forever in their life.

I found myself lucky enough to get the chance to know you.

We might not share those romantic affections or ever waking up in the same bed (god, thats gotta be really awkward :| ) . We don't even found ourselves meet every day. You know, some people were just destined to have their
own seperate way, and we are one of them.

But you know there's gonna be this one day. When everything seems to be fine between us, and we finally meet again in a halfway. And when that time comes we gonna talk as if the sun knows no dawn. We gonna share all this movies and books and music we have read, watched, and listened to, all the sceneries we have seen in our journey and those dirty little secret we made along the way.  Our smiles is even wider than ear to ear, and our laughs, yes our laughs, their just gonna be so loud as its just unbearable to hold them.

And when that day come, though it's just a short one day, it's gonna feel like we have shared a lifetime together.

Just right before the sun sets and we drift apart again to continue our own life, with a half full jar of happiness that we will cherish until our next rendevouz.

the happiest kind of love

I remember once my cousin told me that when you close your eyes the time will pass you by faster
Then she told me again that, it is why we can sleep for hours and hours and wake up at noon without even realize that we've been sleeping for so long.
Or how roller coaster ride will feel less scarier when we close our eyes tightly

my theory is;
not seeing things means we put less sweat on things that are going on, means a worry less kind of life, means we're happier, and yes time tends to move faster when we're happy, no? 

and it is pretty much explaining why a blind love is the happiest kind of love X))

or explaining how these past few years are passing me by incredibly fast
 

ig·nore

verb \ig-ˈnȯr\

  : to refuse to take notice of; to reject (a bill of indictment) as ungrounded (merriam-webster)

 

ig·no·rance

noun \ˈig-n(ə-)rən(t)s\

  : the state or fact of being ignorant : lack of knowledge, education, or awareness 

An early Christmas gift that i gave to myself few days ago, a privilege to feel no sorry for anything. Because sometimes it is good to know and feel nothing about anything or anyone. To be unaware of everything. and in my most honest opinion; everyone kinda deserve to be an ignorance selfish bitch for once in a while. Give yourself a break from this drama kind of life people. Lived your life like you're the only star in this live soap opera. We give too much sweat on everything and everyone, and now it is time for us to shine, to diva around, and put those spot light back above our head. 

i am not justify this as a good attitude to have. but really we all need to give ourselves a break for once in a while. we are all deserve it. just don't get carried away for too long.

Melancholia

A poem by Charles Bukowski

the history of melancholia
includes all of us.
me, I writhe in dirty sheets
while staring at blue walls
and nothing.
I have gotten so used to melancholia
that
I greet it like an old
friend.
I will now do 15 minutes of grieving
for the lost redhead,
I tell the gods.
I do it and feel quite bad
quite sad,
then I rise
CLEANSED
even though nothing
is solved.
that's what I get for kicking
religion in the ass.
I should have kicked the redhead
in the ass
where her brains and her bread and
butter are
at ...
but, no, I've felt sad
about everything:
the lost redhead was just another
smash in a lifelong
loss ...
I listen to drums on the radio now
and grin.
there is something wrong with me
besides
melancholia.

i want to release everything that my body content. to emptied it out. fully. so that i will have nothing inside me. but not the kind of emptiness that will you leave a hole in your body or a lonely feeling after it. though, all this time I’ve put everything inside of me, and carried them around. yet, i still feel lonely most of the time. but you know, the kind of emptiness that will leave you a lighter body. that when you lay on the ground and made yourself a snow angel you’ll feel like the wind could lift you up off the ground. and when you close your eyes all you see is not a dark hole but a kaleidoscope sky.the emptiness that finally freed you.

better late than never no?

it takes three and a half years
471 notes in note pad
hundred unwritten poems in my head
and so much for #nomention letters in twitter and tumblr and here

for me to realized that no matter how good you're changing
if it turns you into a stranger to yourself
if you do it for other's sake
then it is not a good change

:"}

pooƃ slǝǝɟ ɐpuıʞ ʇı puɐ ˙noʎ ɟo ǝsnɐɔǝq ɹǝƃuol ou s,ʇı puɐ ʎɐɹd ı